Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t cotton to rapists

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Why don't we hear our own snoring?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I can read

Why was the rock band Kiss so successful?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Air India plane crash death toll rises to 270 - BBC

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I actually pay taxes

Why can't the ISS take a picture of Earth and prove to the Flat Earth Society that Earth is not really flat?

I can count

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

My boyfriend wants to break up over too many petty arguments. To me, they are molehills because I truly love him & don't really think twice about them. If he loved me would he work through it?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Proba-3’s first artificial solar eclipse - European Space Agency

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Why do some children hate their parents?

I don’t buy bullshit

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What does it mean when we dream about demons, ghosts, monsters, etc.?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Boulder County resident exposed Flatiron Flyer passengers to measles - The Denver Post

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Are you struggling with weight loss and finding it hard to stay consistent? What’s your biggest challenge when trying to lose weight at home?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

What are some hard truths that MAGA needs to hear?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

If you could go back and rewrite the Legend of Korra, what would you change, and why?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Why is it that when the Democrats absolutely love everyone to be LGBTP, they don't even acknowledge that Barack Obama and his husband Big Mike are homosexual, and he is the first homosexual president of the USA?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for fakery

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I see through liars

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions